We have a very, very long road ahead of us and the last couple of days it has been hitting me. I keep picturing what the next few months are going to be like. When we first started this journey and decided that we needed to sell the house and get the hell out of Dodge I would imagine what our future would look like. I pictured us living in a great new neighborhood, making new friends, watching the kids explore our new state and learning all about it together. Never, ever not once did I picture all the crap that goes along with moving. I am not a good mover. I am not a good packer. I suck at following through on ANYTHING. I have severe ADD and most of the time leave projects about 60% done and walk away. It's how I roll. But with moving you kind of have to give it 100%. So now that we are getting closer to the time where we will be packing I am starting to panic. Starting to picture the melt downs, the arguments, the screaming, the pouting. Oh and by the way, that will all be me. All me, pouting and all. I know I am not easy to live with sometimes, I know that it must be hard for my husband and my oldest daughter Allison (who are both so far from having any kind of Attention Deficit issue that it's not even funny) to have me as the wife and mom but they are stuck with me and they have kind of learned how to handle me.
Chris is flying out next week to meet with a new company, I am not giving details yet until I know more but lets just say he will more than likely get the job. He booked his flight tonight and I was like 'oh my gosh this is really happening'. If this does indeed happen we will be living on the complete other side of the country by Christmas, or even sooner, Christmas is just kind of my timeline to be all moved in and settled. But when I say that we could be living there by Christmas I mean all of us, Chris will be leaving before us, which means that I will be left to do all the packing and moving myself. OH MY GOD. Seriously? What in the world am I going to do. Can you imagine the amount of xanax I am going to have to ingest? Can you imagine how much my children are going to hate me by the time we move?
This whole adventure has been kind of exciting but scary at the same time. I feel like we are taking a huge leap of faith. I mean there is a good chance that the girls and I are going to be moving there completely sight unseen. Never having visited. I have a good friend who lives there and she has been filling me in on lots of information and helping me with neighborhoods and schools so that for sure helps, gives me a certain level of comfort.
I look forward to sharing the rest of the story when I am able to offer more information and take you on my journey with me. Until then, I will be putting boxes together and deciding what to pack/save/toss/sell at a garage sale!
Oh, the suspense! Can't wait to hear what happened, xo
ReplyDeleteWow. That's an incredibly stressful situation. No wonder you are a little freaked out.
ReplyDeleteTantrums are okay. Just keep the heavy objects out of reach. Everyone will get through it.
You can do hard things. You already have. Be kind to yourself and just expect screw ups. When they happen, deal with it and let it go. If you go into it expecting perfection, you'll just get frustrated with yourself.
And since you've already said that you'll be having meltdowns and tantrums it sounds like you're all set. Just remember to forgive yourself and move on. You can do this.