So, wow it's been a while. Over a month since I wrote anything on here or anywhere else really. I think it's just been a really busy month!
At the end of June we went to California (notice that I didn't way we went 'home' even though I still tend to call CA home sometimes I am working on letting go). Chris and I had to go tie up some loose ends and take care of a few things. Allison went with us. Gianna decided she wanted to stay in North Carolina with her cousins since she doesn't like to fly. Leaving her was excruciating, I felt so bad. She cried the morning we flew out and I cried all the way to California basically. By the second day things were much better and we were all good. We were very generously loaned a car by a friend for the week and we stayed with our friends that have also been storing half of our stuff for 7 months... that was one of the 'loose ends' we had to tie up, go through our stuff that was left there and decide what would eventually come to South Carolina, what could be sold and what could be tossed. It was a daunting task but we did it and we both feel so much better now that we have seen our stuff, know whats coming and were able to get rid of ALOT of it!
I had mixed feelings about going. I for sure wasn't ready. For one, we are loving it here so much and I have so been looking forward to summer here that I didn't want to miss any of it. I certainly didn't want to miss any of it to go spend time in the hot desert of Southern California. I hate the heat of the desert. I lived there for the better part of 20 years and never got used to it, never enjoyed it.
I also didn't know how I felt about going back to the place that I couldn't wait to get out of. Not California, but the desert. As we flew over the desert I could look out the window and see everything, I saw Allison's high school (man, that kid loves and misses that school soo much), I could see the streets, the country clubs, all the familiar things that were part of my life for so very long. I knew how happy Allison was to be going there, how she couldn't wait to see Blake, her friends and to go to all of her favorite places. I got it, until almost 8 months ago this was all my kids had ever known. It was their world. I took them from it. We made them give it all up and move all the way across the country to start all over. That's hard. I did my best to keep a stiff upper lip and not think about all the awful things that make me hate the desert so much and to concentrate on the things that happened there that were good. It's hard, I won't lie. I am still resentful and emotional, still not ready to say 'oh man I miss this place'.
The trip ended up going very well. My brother Danny and my niece Sarah picked us up from the airport. That was perfect. We are all very close and being away from them for this long has been hard. Danny and I usually talk at least weekly, sometimes two or three times a week but to see him, to hang out with him and Sarah was so much better than just being on the phone with them.
We spent time with people that we missed so much. Oh, I forgot! One of the highlights of the trip was surprising Chris's parents by having Allison with us! My mother in law's face when she saw her oldest granddaughter get out of the car with me was priceless! I love that she got to see them, but we were all a little sad that Gianna wasn't there too for the surprise.